Day: January 27, 2012

Mother Gives Birth To Baby On Way To Hospital NSFW??

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Well look at what I found! Imagine looking down and there’s a baby in your pants? This has to have been the calmest, most laid back child birth ever. No pushing or pain. Just ‘Hunny, our kid just fell out.’ The only thing I can honestly say ‘thank god’ for is the fact that she was sitting down. She’s clearly so loose that the kid woulda just fell out onto the floor. Hopefully they got to the hospital safely (as long as the driver stopped filming) and the baby is OK.

Side Note: How about in 10 years when this kid has the awkwardness of watching himself get spit out of his mom’s vagina on the Whitestone Bridge on Youtube. Love to watch the ‘reaction video’ to that.

Bill Cundiff Can’t Catch A Break; Even On His Own Team’s Website

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Yahoo!Sports: Is there no safe place left on this earth for Billy Cundiff? Not even the Ravens’ very own website can stop from poking Cundiff with a sharp stick. This wasn’t a message board or a comments section, either ‒ it wasn’t even an editorial piece. It was the team’s web store. Of course, the organization might still be a bit bitter about the 32-yard field goal Cundiff missed at the end of the AFC Championship game. That miss prevented a tie that would have taken the game to overtime in the New England Patriots’ eventual 23-20 win, but the pass Lee Evans lost in the end zone on that same drive would have put the Ravens in the Super Bowl, and you don’t see mean things about Evans in the web store. It’s a rough life, this kicking thing.

 

Ouch, $107.99 for a Billy Cundiff jersey?! They probably couldn’t give those things away right now let alone pay that much for a kid’s version of it. When you’re own team’s website posts something like this, it’s time to leave town and move on. Wonder what Kyle Williams jerseys are currently going for?

New Cologne Helps Cheating Husbands Mask Smells

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HuffPost:

Thanks to groundbreaking innovation in the aftershave industry, men making excuses about their strip clubs visits can now have smells to back them up. Metro reports that Mavericks strip club in South Africa has launched a line of “Alibi” aftershave products designed to make men smell the way they would if their excuses for staying out late were actually legit. “My Car Broke Down,” for example, smells like fuel, burnt rubber grease and steel, according to Metro. But Margy Bons of Operation Homefront told KNXV the cologne is unlikely to keep women from sniffing out the truth. “If he’s coming home at 1 o’clock in the morning, I don’t care. You can wear Alibi all you want, we’re still gonna have to look for that alibi,” Bons told the station. Also doubtful of the product’s usefulness, JOE’s Amy Wall notes that other, more traditional options are already available to sneaky men. “Apparently people would actually wear an aftershave that smells like burnt rubber,” Wall wrote. “We wonder why they wouldn’t just take a shower instead?”

 

And who are the men that this product is made for? The men that are unfortunately married to these women who remind me of ‘The View.’ Christ, how annoying are they? Know-it-alls who think it would never happen to them and they could sniff out a cheater a mile away. It’s all giggles and jokes during this segment, meanwhile their husbands are showering themselves in Alibi as they speak. ‘If your husband is out there buying Alibi…you know! There’s no secret there!’ Yea, that’s why you won’t know if he’s buying Alibi. Because he won’t tell you just like he won’t tell you that he’s had his face buried in a stripper tits all night. ‘Yea, but you can’t hide the bottle!’ Hiding the bottle isn’t the hard part, it’s the glitter on my face I would be worried about.

Side Note: Since when were strip clubs such a bad place for married men to be? Big deal, he’s watching a naked chick dance on stage. At least he’s not out banging your best friend behind your back. You can only cage an animal for so long…