Posts Tagged ‘vibrator’

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Gawker: A Norwegian fisherman was gutting a large cod he’d caught when he ran across an unusual lump in his fish. Probably just some semi-digested herrings, right? No big deal. (Spoiler: It wasn’t just semi-digested herrings.) As Bjørn Frilund, 64, got further inside the fish, he realized his catch had somehow swallowed a medium-sized orange dildo. The fisherman, who lives in western Norway, confirmed he’d never encountered a sex toy inside a fish before. (You don’t say!) “The dildo looks like what the fish eat. We have a kind of multicolored octopus in Norway, maybe the cod thought this was one of these and ate it,” Frilund told The Local. “There may be a frustrated wife who threw the dildo overboard from the ship,” he speculated, acknowledging that “all sorts of stories are equally likely.” The dildo had a vibrator motor in it at one time, but was broken by the time Frilund found it. There were no batteries inside the fish.

In today’s world, between Jimmy Kimmel and viral videos for publicity, it’s very hard to believe anything on the internet. That’s why everyone should be very skeptical when they hear about a fisherman gutting a fish only to find a vibrator in its stomach. That being said, I’m taking this story and running with it. Why not, right? My only question is could you still eat a fish after finding a sex toy in its belly. Not me.

 

 

 

Girls: Introducing The Vibrator Alarm Clock

Posted: February 11, 2014 by subwaycreatures in Funny
Tags: , ,

 

HuffPost: It’s a vibrator/alarm clock hybrid called the Wake-Up Vibe. Set the timer, put it in your panties and when the time comes, you… well… you get the idea. While the alarm might wake you up, the orgasms from the advertised six levels of vibration might keep you in bed a little longer than you planned, the product’s website says. “Be careful of being late,” it warns. “It’s addictive.” In case you don’t feel like waiting until morning, the device offers a manual mode for more immediate stimulation. The device is sleek, curved and comes in three colors — almost like a new product from Apple. And while the Wake-Up Vibe may sound like a hoax (especially given the grammatical mistakes on the product’s website), it’s listed as currently available on Amazon.com, where it’s selling for between $91.15 and $96.25, depending on the color. There’s even a review from an unhappy customer. “Wakey Wakey? Barely,” posts a user named Lucky. “If you’re looking for a vibrator alarm clock… okay, you’ve got one. But, the vibrations are weak and buzzy for a stand alone vibrator — and even as an alarm clock, this could fail to do the trick.” Looks like the Wake-Up Vibe might be getting the wrong kind of buzz.

 

I like the innovative thinking here but if you’re late to work everyday because you’ve got a vibrating alarm clock lodged between your legs then you probably also own around 10 cats. Ladies? What do you think?

 

 

 

I was watching the presidential debate when they were talking about unemployment and I thought to myself, I don’t think the unemployment rate is THAT bad, right? Well these guys just dick slapped me in the face with that thought. Not only is it bad, but this is what people are doing with their free time. Just hanging out firing vibrators from high powered, specially designed slingshots. My God, we’re all fucked…