Posts Tagged ‘Sex toy’

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Gawker: A Norwegian fisherman was gutting a large cod he’d caught when he ran across an unusual lump in his fish. Probably just some semi-digested herrings, right? No big deal. (Spoiler: It wasn’t just semi-digested herrings.) As Bjørn Frilund, 64, got further inside the fish, he realized his catch had somehow swallowed a medium-sized orange dildo. The fisherman, who lives in western Norway, confirmed he’d never encountered a sex toy inside a fish before. (You don’t say!) “The dildo looks like what the fish eat. We have a kind of multicolored octopus in Norway, maybe the cod thought this was one of these and ate it,” Frilund told The Local. “There may be a frustrated wife who threw the dildo overboard from the ship,” he speculated, acknowledging that “all sorts of stories are equally likely.” The dildo had a vibrator motor in it at one time, but was broken by the time Frilund found it. There were no batteries inside the fish.

In today’s world, between Jimmy Kimmel and viral videos for publicity, it’s very hard to believe anything on the internet. That’s why everyone should be very skeptical when they hear about a fisherman gutting a fish only to find a vibrator in its stomach. That being said, I’m taking this story and running with it. Why not, right? My only question is could you still eat a fish after finding a sex toy in its belly. Not me.

 

 

 

Kid Runs Around Room With Mom’s Massive Dildo

Posted: September 11, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Funny
Tags: , , ,

 

Think Dennis the Menace here will be laughing in 10 years when he realizes his mom was chasing him around because he was playing hide n’ seek with a dildo bigger than him? I think not. By the way, this might be one of the funniest GIFS I’ve ever made.

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Huffington Post:

After horrific experience with a sex toy sent her to the hospital, a Northern California woman is a suing a Southern California “marital aid” manufacturer for personal injury and emotional duress. Yreka resident April Bonjour states in her suit that, late last year, she and her boyfriend were using a vibrator made by Pipedream Products when she suddenly noticed that something was wrong. “During usage I felt a sharp pain inside my vagina,” she wrote. “My boyfriend quickly removed the toy, it was covered with blood.” Bonjour initially thought she might have just started her period, but she realized something else was definitely happening when she continued to lose blood to the point where she began slipping in and out of consciousness. “My son was woken up so we could go to the hospital,” she wrote. “He thought it I was dying…[and] quite frankly so did I.” Once at the hospital, Bonjour’s condition stabilized after she was administered several pints of blood. After the incident, Bonjour attempted to get some compensation from the Pipedreams, but the company refused and she filed suit. SF Weekly notes that that Pipedream’s official company motto is, “We Don’t Make the Orgasm…We Make the Orgasm BETTER!”

 

I was waiting for this story to happen after they released the Googlher but I guess it didn’t even take that long. This story kinda reminds me of my first time. Confusion…crying…slipping in and out of consciousness. No hospital visit but I probably should have if you saw what this girl looked like. I feel for the kid here. Imagine getting woken up in the middle of the night because of this. How do you even begin to explain this one? ‘Son, we were using Mommy’s Pipedreams and shit went south. I didn’t but the situation did. But don’t worry, we’re going to be rich very soon to pay for your therapy.’