Man Is Saved Last Second After Trying To Jump In Front Of Train By Colombian Cop

Posted: April 23, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Dumb
Tags: , , , , , ,

 

Is this as big of a problem everywhere else than it is in NYC? Every other week I feel like someone is flinging themselves on the subway tracks here. Out of all the ways you could kill yourself why would you jump in front of a train pulling into a station? The trains aren’t moving at top speed and there’s a chance it won’t even kill you. I would be so pissed if I was trying to kill myself and just got my legs steamrolled. If things were bad enough before, NOW you have even more reason to kill yourself. Here are my top 5 worst ways of offing yourself:

5) Jumping off a building – I’m terrified of heights as it is and the fact that I could accidentally land on someone on the ground is pretty unfair of me.

4) Cutting down the river – I have no problem with the sight of blood but slitting my wrists kinda seems painful and the fact that I have to sit there and watch myself bleed out sounds boring.

3) Jumping in front of a train – See above.

2) Setting yourself on fire – Why would anyone want to torture themselves like this? You literally live most of the time you’re burning and going through the worst pain ever.

1) Diving in a wood chipper – I know this sounds crazy but I heard a story a little while back of a guy who took his wallet out of his pocket and nose dived into one of these bad boys. I only hope it was a quick death for his sake.

 

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