Some Woman Tried To Turn A NYC Subway Car Into A Slip N Slide


There’s been a lot of shit going on in the subway this past week but none that really top what happened on the Q train yesterday. Some ratchet chick decided to turn a pretty empty car into a fuckin’ slip-n-slide. Yes, she was sliding around the floor of the subway car on her stomach like a massive walrus. I believe one commenter put it the best way possible: I think she just caught the herpagonasyphilaids. Ha! She would be lucky if that’s all she got.




Opossum Causes D Train Evacuation


A surly straphanger curled up underneath a seat caused a Bronx-bound D train to be evacuated early Friday morning. The New York Times reports an opossum was spotted on the train sometime after leaving Coney Island at 4:30AM, warming up by a heating radiator. It remains unclear how or why the opossum boarded the train, although one animal expert wonders if it was drawn to the heat or the smell of food. Passengers were given the boot from the train when it got to West 4th Street, where officials tried to collar the creature but retreated when it “bared its teeth and snarled.” The train was then brought to a subway yard in the Bronx where it was to be met by Animal Care and Control agents, who were to remove the opossum but who have not yet confirmed that they’ve done so…


First we have enormous pre-historic sized rats in Foot Locker and now opossums commuting on the D train uptown. What the shit is going on? Opossum’s are just over sized rats so let’s not try to make it sound like its “only an opossum.” These things are just as nasty as subway rats so yes, I wouldn’t want to be riding in this car but why an evacuation? Move people to another car and keep that train moving! If I’m awake at 4:30am and trying to get to my job and get rerouted because of this I would be so pissed I would probably go home and take the day off. How many alternate trains do you think are running at 4:30am down on W 4th St. and how much motivation do you think I would have to walk to another train? None. Take a pic of the opossum, email it to my boss, and call it a day.