Posts Tagged ‘dumb’


There’s been a lot of shit going on in the subway this past week but none that really top what happened on the Q train yesterday. Some ratchet chick decided to turn a pretty empty car into a fuckin’ slip-n-slide. Yes, she was sliding around the floor of the subway car on her stomach like a massive walrus. I believe one commenter put it the best way possible: I think she just caught the herpagonasyphilaids. Ha! She would be lucky if that’s all she got.





Internet Troll: a person who sows discord on the Internet by starting arguments or upsetting people,by posting inflammatory,extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community (such as a forum, chat room, or blog) with the deliberate intent of provoking readers into an emotional responseor of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.

Now with that being said, our poor stripper friends are getting their asses handed to them in yesterday’s troll of the day. I was literally watching the comments pop up on the post in real-time with a bag of popcorn just laughing my ass off. You know how you kill an internet troll? You don’t respond and give them ammo. These people were feeding the beast the entire time and he was dropping line after line on them–memes included. I know it’s a lot to read through but it’s all amazing. I promise you this is real and the last names have been blurred to protect those involved. Enjoy!

Side note: I have no goddamn idea what the original post was all about so don’t ask!


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Gothamist: The concept of Beezin’ is simple enough: spread a good amount of Burt’s Bees-brand mint lip balm on/around your eye and your face goes on a crazy-ass menthol trip. Beezin’ gives you about ten minutes of minty, clouded vision and a fuckload of tears. If you’ve ever dove eyes-open into a pool of Scope (who hasn’t?) then you know the feeling. Having Burts Bees on your eyelids feels like riding in a convertible through a mint field in January. It’s cold yet somehow comforting.


So this has actually been around since 2005 and it’s called Beezin’. Let’s just officially put it on the list of dumbest ways kids are looking for some kind of high. I feel old as shit saying this but whatever happened to cutting class and smoking a joint in the middle of the day? No, instead these little bastards are cramming vodka soaked tampons up their asses along with funnels of beer. Or how about chugging hand sanitizer or smoking coffee grinds? All on the ever growing list of retarded shit the youth of America is doing these days. Why would anyone want this? Not a good look.






Thank you Utah…for making my Monday morning more cringe worthy than it already was! For those of you who saw Miss South Carolina’s answer about stupid kids not being able to locate the US on a world map in 2007 have seen worse than this but this is why these chicks are in beauty pageants and not world leaders. Just keep smiling and looking hot and you’ll be fine, hun. Oh yea…you didn’t think she was getting out of this post without this treatment did you…?


The Boyfriend Trainer App Is A Joke…Right?

Posted: January 31, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Dumb
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EliteDaily: The “Boyfriend Trainer” game available both through iTunes and Android stores, is getting some spotlight. The game encourages gamers to “crack that whip and teach your guy a thing or two. When scolding doesn’t work, just zap him, whack him and train him to be your ideal man!” The “girlfriend” (the player) advances through the game by physically abusing her “boyfriend.” While some people see this as harmless fun, other are worried that it may give younger users the wrong impression. One customer review says: “I hate how this game is so abusive I understand its just a game but kids play this and u don’t want this to be an influence on them.”


I’m gonna come right out and say that obviously if this were the other way around I think every Vagina Monologues reading bitch would be all over these people for releasing such a game. That aside, let’s talk about the inaccuracy of this app. ‘When scolding doesn’t work, zap or whack him to make him your ideal man.’ Since when has that ever gotten a girl shit other than a black eye?! If this game wants to accurately portray real life, the girl’s character should either flash her tits or lift her skirt every time there’s something she wants the man to do. That’s really how women get shit done. Sex. The power of the pussy. I’ve seen friends put their foot down and hold their ground like they were defending the Alamo and all it takes is that one look from their girl and they know. Fuck, what did I just do?! And no, this isn’t promoting whoredom. It’s “boyfriend training.” You wanna ring a bell and have your man come running like one of Pavlov’s dogs, then that’s what the app should really be like.

Side note: Hey girls, don’t get use to that kind of training because after about a year together it’s completely useless and you’re on your own.



TheChive: That Statement Warrants A Facepalm!

Gawker: Man Punches Woman And Throws Her Onto Subway Tracks

Guyism: Man Needs 1 Million “Likes” And Girl Will Have Sex With Him

Barstool: Lance Armstrong Had The Line Of The Night Yesterday

BroBible: @KUBoobs Is A Twitter Account Comprised Of Girls Boobs From University of Kansas

TheChive: Boy, That Escalated Quickly [PHOTOS]

HuffPost: The DeLorean Hovercraft Is A Sight To See

DeadSpin: Man Who Posed As Manti Te’o’s Girlfriend Had Auditioned For ‘The Voice’

SitchNews: Man Run Over And Kill When Own Dog Hits Car Accelerator

Egotastic! Model Theresa Ortiz Drops Some Heat In Miami [PHOTOS]

Yababoon: Watch A Montage Of People Slip On The Same Patch Of Ice

EliteDaily: The Largest Campus Riots Of All Time

Mashable: Check Out The Sports Floor Of The Future


Consequences of trying to impress the judges by showing them you think you know English. You got the translator right there, you needed him to read you the question so why answer in English? All I got out of that was something about surfing and no law. In all honesty was anyone expecting an intelligent answer from any of these women? Andy Cohen’s reaction summed it all up when she was done. Thank you!…OK??

Side note: You knew this video below was coming…come on!

Someone Filmed A Butt Chug Over The Weekend

Posted: December 10, 2012 by subwaycreatures in Dumb
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Oh college how I miss thee. Times, however, appear to have changed a little bit. Butt chugging is now a thing as well as stuffing alcohol soaked tampons in your ass. I don’t get it but who am I to judge? This is coming from the guy who smoked chewing tobacco out of a bong for some reason. Anyway, this kid is one hospital visit away from a news press conference to deny he ever had a tube funneling beer into his rectum.