The Snowball Slingshot May Just Be One Of The Biggest Gimmicks I’ve Ever Seen

Picture 22Hammacher: This is the snowball-hurling slingshot that brings snowball battles into the 21st century. A baseball-sized snowball is placed into the slingshot’s muzzle, drawn back, and fired at opposing forces, helping to facilitate their hasty withdrawal or surrender. The distance a snowball travels depends on the force applied to the medical-grade elastic tubing, allowing children to engage in close-range confrontations. Made of durable, polypropylene/styrene-based plastic that withstands the rigors of winter play. Includes target for practicing accuracy. Ages 8 and up.


Did I mention it fires at 35 MPH and up to 100 yards?! No? That’s because I completely just made that up. Pointless if you ask me. I have no idea what the mechanics of this thing are but what happened to just packing snow in your hands and throwing it? Especially when you have a deadly accurate howitzer arm like myself? I’m sorry that I don’t want to pack a snowball and load it like a Civil War musket with a rubber band lever and shit. Save it for the rookies. Besides, it’s 2013 and post Global Warming…it doesn’t snow anymore.

So Did Anyone Else Catch That Bullshit Failed Assassination Attempt In Bulgaria Last Night?

SkyNews: The 25-year-old who pulled the gun on the head of Bulgaria’s Turkish minority party leader while he was speaking at a party conference was only trying to frighten his target. Police have revealed that Oktay Enimehmedov, an ethnic Turk originally from the eastern city of Burgas, thought he would die in the attack and left a letter at his Sofia flat. Police psychology institute chief Nedelcho Stoychev said the attacker did not intend to kill Dogan but only to frighten him and “get his five minutes of fame.” Ahmed Dogan, swiped away his attacker’s arm before any shot was fired and the weapon appeared to jam. Dramatic video of the attack against the 58-year-old leader of the liberal Movement for Rights and Freedoms party quickly circulated online. Several men wrestled Enimehmedov to the ground and he is seen in the footage being punched and kicked. Police experts examined the small handgun and said it would not have threatened Dogan’s life, even if fired from close quarters. Gas pistols are mainly used for self-defence and can fire tear gas cartridges. Prosecutors in Sofia have charged Enimehmedov with hooliganism and making death threats. Deputy chief prosecutor Borislav Sarafov said he faces up to five years in prison on the hooliganism charge and up to six years in prison on the death threat charge.


When I saw this last night I was thinking this is a scene straight out of a movie. Manchurian Candidate who fucks up the assassination and then the Bulgarian government has to cover it up and there’s a massive publicity that hinders the cover up. But no. Ho hum, just another asshole trying to get his 5 minutes in the limelight. Officials said the gun wouldn’t have even killed the guy. What’s that shit all about? Pretty sure a BB gun could still do damage if pressed up against someone’s temple. The best part was clearly the guy getting kicked around the stage like an empty can on the street. Then there was a lot of dirka dirka yelling and it was all over. Thanks Bulgaria, I have no idea where you are on a map.

Man Nearly Blows His Head Off With Shot Gun


Remember growing up when your parents would always tell you not to put your face over the fireworks you were about to light? Well this is kinda like that only with a high powered shot gun. People like this deserve to get Kurt Cobain’d because if you’re stupid enough to put your face over the barrel of a shot gun that you just pumped 2 rounds into, I can’t feel bad for you. If the hat you’re wearing on your head has a hole in it that looks like a gaping asshole, you know something went wrong. Now go buy a lottery ticket because today is your lucky day.