Posts Tagged ‘Ryan Lochte’


For anyone who followed CSC during the Summer (Special) Olympics knows how much I despise Ryan Lochte. Respect the shit out of him for his swimming talents but Jesus Christ, it’s like someone held him under water until oxygen stopped going to his brain. How this guy has a reality show is beyond me. Maybe it’s that ‘bad car wreck’ theory that E! is going after just like the Kardashians but I would hope someone gets fired after this. These morning news anchors are spot on. How are they going to fill an entire show–no less an entire season of this shit?? I could argue that following around Stephen Hawking with reality cameras would be better entertainment. You have no idea how bad I was praying they forgot to shut Ryan’s mic and camera feed off and he got to sit there and watch these two people hysterically laugh at him.

Side note: You could make the argument that Lochte’s lower torso is a female if you cut the top off


Picture 26

With this being my own personal list, I feel like there will obviously be some discrepancies but deal with it. These people I HATE with a passion and I don’t throw that word around lightly. The following names were based off of ignorance, annoyance, public appearance, dumbness, and overall douchebaggery.

10. Heidi & Spencer Pratt

Wasn’t sure people like this really existed until this couple came along. Even in their TV interviews when not filming they manage to act like complete assholes. Sometimes I ask myself if this is real life.


9. The entire Kardashian/Jenner Clan

Keeping on the “reality/I’m famous for no apparent reason” subject we have the Kardashian/Jenner family. Satan himself has to have given birth to these intolerable walks of life and we all have to pay the price thanks to E! They bring down the perception of America and with people like Scott Disick and Kanye West jumping on ship, it only gets worse.


8. Alex Rodriguez

Once nabbed with steroids it was all over for ARod. Literally his body started falling apart as well as his career. But what does he care? He’s got a gajillion dollars to fall back on of guaranteed money that the Yankees will be paying him for the next several years. If it wasn’t tiffs with fellow teammates or Cameron Diaz feeding him popcorn it was photos like below. Possibly one of the most selfish athletes of all time.


7. Ryan Lochte

Ryan I didn’t forget about you, brother! When you win a medal at the Olympic games and officials demand you take the diamond studded grill out of your mouth you are officially an asshole. If it weren’t for swimming I’m almost positive Ryan Lochte would be pushing shopping carts in the parking lot of his local grocery store. Man is brain dead to say the least as well as one of the biggest douche bags you’ll run into in Olympic Village.

Ryan Lochte

6. Jerry Sandusky

Only thing that saves dirty ol’ Sandusky from the 5 spot is that he didn’t get away with his crime. This sick bastard not only diddled little boys but in my view was responsible for Joe Paterno’s death as well. Life in jail must be the worst thing in the world unless you’re into butt rapes…oh wait he is.


5. Casey Anthony

This bitch. Not her fault she’s walking free right now but it is her fault her kid is dead. I’ve haven’t seen someone so guilty walk since O.J. and even he’s bunkin’ in jail right now. Looking at this chick makes me wish Sandusky got his hands on her.


4-3. Karl Rove and Michael Moore

I’m a fan of politics like I’m a fan of AIDS; keep’em away. That being said, these clown dicks are the epitome of their respective parties. You can honestly put either one at 4 or 3 and I wouldn’t have a problem with it. Each one is just as more ridiculous as the other. The fact that they even have political influence is a scary thought.


2. Rupert Murdoch

I don’t think I’ve ever patiently waited longer for someone to die before. From tapping people’s phones to running one of the biggest bullshit media outlets next to The Onion, the crypt keeper absolutely deserves the #2 spot. When you see people on his networks/newspapers go so far out of their way to make people believe something false, it comes off desperate. But because of his power, reach, and influence it magnifies his douchbaggery.


1. Kanye “Yeezy” West

Where to start, where to start? First, let’s get one thing straight, we’re not talking about music here. I’m talking about hurricane benefits turned into almost bigger disasters than the ones they were raising money for. OK, that’s an exaggeration but still, the guy is a clear cut #1 in my eyes. Whether it’s accusing the President of hating black people, drunkenly interrupting award speeches, dropping F and N bombs all night during a benefit concert, or wearing leather skirts, Kanye can go fuck himself. #1 attention whore in the world and there’s not even anyone in a close second.

2009 MTV Video Music Awards - Show


Honorable Mentions: Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino, Donald Trump, all Occupy Wall Street hippies.


I hate everything Ryan Lochte represents other than the USA. The guy defines the word ‘tool’ and this has been a big week for him. I’m not talking about him swimming. I’m talking about his mother coming out telling the world her son only does one-night stands, his ‘cool’ mouth piece, and his overall arrogance. The guy resembles a dumber Jeff Spicoli from Fast Times at Ridgemont High if that’s even possible and I can’t do anything but cringe when he’s interviewed. If this dude couldn’t swim I’m 99% sure he’d be a cum dumpster behind In-N-Out. In fact, I hope he makes the best of his 15 minutes because after the Olympics he’ll do some reality show, fizzle out, and Ryan Lochte will be the guy you call up to plunge your toilet. Again, I hate him.