Posts Tagged ‘Texas’

 

O.M.G! Probably could’ve done without one of those this morning but I guess that’s now in every females vocabulary these days. Love how cool this construction worker plays it the entire time. Like yea, he knows the apartment is going up like it’s made of hay but there’s a ton of people watching from the adjacent building. Gotta Bruce Willis his way out of this one.

Side note: That swing onto the next level balcony was nuts. I might have taken my chances with the fire.

HuffPost: Lucy Millsap, a 19-year-old former cheerleader from Texas, is the first woman to win the annual Okie Noodling Tournament in Pauls Valley, Okla. Millsap, who has been noodling since she was 5 years old, beat out about 200 other contestants in the bare-handed fishing derby by landing a 72-pound catfish at Lake Texoma on Saturday, according to the Oklahoman. Millsap represented her handfishing club, the “Bare Knuckle Babes.” It was her first competition. GrindTV reports that Millsap’s enormous fish was the largest caught in the tournament’s 14-year history. According to Tulsa World, Millsap’s win caused a bit of controversy among participants in the predominantly male sport. The fact that she is a Texan apparently didn’t sit too well among the hosting Okies, either. “There was a lot of trash talk at the event,” Millsap told the outlet. “Men would walk by and say slurs in my ear, say ‘You couldn’t catch that by yourself.’ I had men go so far as to curse and cuss at me and stuff. I thought, ‘Really? How big was the fish you weighed in? Thirty pounds? I thought so. Nice to meet you, too.'” Noodling, or handfishing, is a method in which sportsmen (and sportswomen) stick their hands and arms into holes in murky water with the hope that a large catfish will latch onto them. Sound risky? It is. Millsap told Tulsa World that the winning fish gave her a bit of a fight; it “rolled like an alligator” and injured her hand. The sport and the peculiar subculture surrounding it was the subject of the 2001 documentary “Okie Noodling,” directed by Oklahoma native Bradley Beesley. In an interview with the Oklahoman, the filmmaker said his documentary was the catalyst for the annual handfishing derby.

 

For those of you who don’t know, Noodling is basically fishing with your bare hands. You stick your hand into an underwater hole and wiggle your fingers until a catfish clamps down on your arm and you pull it out. People are hardcore about this in Oklahoma and that’s why Lucy going into the lion’s den and walking away with a record fish is sexy as hell. She doesn’t give a fuck that she’s from Texas and getting shit on by the locals. Oh, you don’t think I caught this by myself? Well your cute little 30lb catfish was blowing mine when I pulled it out of the water so suck on that, Opie. Love this girl’s ‘fuck you’ style of going about things. Never sleep on the underdog.

And Now For Your WTF Video Of The Week

Posted: May 14, 2013 by subwaycreatures in WTF
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Great to see Sloth from The Goonies is doing well. While I was trying to understand what he was saying the entire time, the only thing I noticed was the sweat ring around his neck progressively getting larger and larger…or was that drool?

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Gawker: Wounded Victim Was The Guy Who Helped Identify The Bombers

Guyism: Tennis Player Cara Black Has Some Sick Tennis Skills

Barstool: Man Survives Boston Marathon Bombing AND Texas Fertilizer Explosion

BroBible: Base Runner Escapes Pickle Against Unimaginable Odds

TheChive: Boy, That Escalated Quickly [PHOTOS]

DeadSpin: Sorority Girl Lashes Out At Her Sisters In Long Letter

HuffPost: Dead Whales Have Really Bad Gas

DailyMail: Photos After Texas Fertilizer Plant Explosion

Egotastic!: Adriana Lima Has Some Lingerie To Sell Us [PHOTOS]

Ranker: 45 Of Your Childhood Crushes (Then and Now)

COEDMagazine: Tanning Mom’s Extremely Unflattering Beach Photos

Gizmodo: Iron Man 3 Has Six Minutes Of Behind The Scenes Footage For You To Watch

HyperVocal: Durex’s New Fundawear Wants To Revolutionize Long Term Relationships

 

I think my ears blew out too and I’m just watching the video…goddamn!

 

‘Kapooya’ Lady Will Go Viral By The End Of The Day

Posted: March 21, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Funny
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Why are ghetto black people the best storytellers of all time? Is it the enthusiasm? Is it the dramatic reenactments? Is it the extra words they throw in that I have no idea the meaning of? Whatever it is, they should always be the first person a reporter goes to when there’s a story to cover. It could be something as boring as insider trading on Wall St. and I’m 100% sure they could turn it into the greatest story ever.

How can you not love the college football bowl season? There are absolutely no other sports to watch on TV and these bowl games are all turning out to be great ones. These three gems appeared on Deadspin this morning and cannot go overlooked. Brendan Gibbons explains how he made the game winning kick in the Sugar Bowl, University of Houston “shocks” Texas, and a Virginia Tech fan jumps for joy. Enjoy!

P.S. – You have to click on the VT Girl to see her in action

HuffPost:

A couple arrested in a Texas fast-food restaurant on drug charges got amorous in the backseat of a cop car taking them to jail on Monday, according to the Montgomery County Police Reporter. Even with their hands cuffed behind their backs, Howard Windham’s pants were somehow unbuttoned and lowered enough for his partner in crime, Tina Marie Arie to perform oral sex. It’s a feat that would impress the lascivious side of Harry Houdini. A constable’s deputy in Porter, outside Houston, noticed that something was up when he looked in the rearview mirror and allegedly saw Arie’s head in Windham’s lap. Arie explained that she was tired, according to the Police Reporter, but the law officer said he saw what was going down and ordered them to break up the hanky-panky. They got into trouble in the first place, because a friend of theirs was passed out in a Whataburger franchise at 2 pm, The Houston Chronicle says. When the officer rustled through the intoxicated man’s pockets to find ID, he came across dozens of painkillers, according to the Police Reporter website. Shortly thereafter, Windham, 30, allegedly tried to drop a pill on the floor, but got caught doing it. Arie, 44, was allegedly holding drugs too, according to The Chronicle. She had prescription bottles of Hydrocodone and Soma. She told police that their knocked-out pal took drugs from her, according to KSAT. Windham was charged with possession of a controlled substance while Arie got booked for delivery of a controlled substance. Their unnamed accomplice was taken to the hospital.

There’s one for the the ol’ bucket list. Getting head in the back of a police car while handcuffed. CHECK.

I don’t see where the huge mystery is on how this guy’s pants were unbuttoned. Just because your hands are handcuffed behind your back doesn’t mean you can’t use them. She clearly unbuttoned his pants by turning her back to him and got to work. They probably could have even finished too if it weren’t 2PM in the afternoon and all of Texas could see into the back of the cop car including the cop who was driving. What’s worse than going to jail? It would have to be going to jail with blue balls, right? I’ll give an A for effort, B- for execution, and F for getting themselves in that position in the first place.