I’m not sure I would ever leave home if I had a setup like this. Baseball field, driving range with chip and putt, stocked pond for fishing, volleyball court, and a regulation basketball court? What else does he need other than maybe a shooting range and a go-kart track? Shit is a water slide and roller coaster away from being straight out of Richie Rich. The price tag on upkeep and maintenance must be a bitch, especially with 6 kids but sell off that Muhammad Ali torch and you’re good for some time.
The Frys.Com Open, by far the most prestigious of all electronics-retailer-website-sponsored golf tournaments, was thrown into chaos today when a deranged fan, armed with a hot dog in a bun, sprinted towards Tiger Woods on the seventh green. Here’s how Woods, who was preparing for a birdie putt at the time, recalls it:
“Some guy just came running on the green, and he had a hot dog, and evidently … I don’t know how he tried to throw it, but I was kind of focusing on my putt when he started yelling.”
The 31-year-old, frankfurter-wielding assailant managed to launch the meat as far as the putting surface (the lighter and less aerodynamic bun barely reached the green), when he was arrested by Santa Clara sheriff’s deputies. Police described him as “very cooperative” during his arrest, though unforthcoming with any motive.
“He just shook his head in guilt or remorse. He didn’t give a reason why he did it.” […]
Dan Diggins, head of security for tournament sponsor Frys Electronics, said the man would be arrested for “everything” and described him as “just an idiot.” Woods, who has reached a level of deep inner-peace in his life — at least where matters of projectile wieners with his name on them are concerned — remained calm throughout the ordeal, but missed his 18-foot putt.
Can we officially call this karma? TW just slingin’ dick all over the place for years and Warren from ‘Something About Mary’ comes running onto the green to slap him in the face with a weiner. Gotta love this guy. He knew immediately he was done and gave in but I feel like if you’re gonna do this then go all the way. At least make security sack your ass! There’s nothing less intimidating than golf security too. Out of shape, middle aged men running at you as quietly as they can in a polo with khakis. If anything I would of been more scared of the retard running onto the green than he was of security. Best part about the whole thing was Tiger missed his putt right after. You suck….jackass!