Man’s Dick Falls Off After Penis Surgery


I just cringed hearing this story. Flesh-eating bacteria? Gang green of the dick? No more sex? Sits to pee? AND the whole world now knows about it? This dude is living every man’s hell. Fuck, I’d go into hiding in Peru too. Like Machu Picchu kind of hiding. I don’t wanna come off insensitive but what’s the point of this guy living anymore? I’d for sure be swan diving into the wood chipper right about now. I could sue for all the money in the world and I wouldn’t be happy without my penis. My philosophy is it’s my dick’s world and I’m just living in it. Just saying…

Thank Christ I Don’t Have Neighbors Like This!

Thank Christ I don’t have neighbors like this. I don’t mean the ‘hard dick’ thing. I know my neighbor likes hard dick cause I have to listen to her through the walls of my apartment. I mean the driving around yelling into a bull horn like it’s some kind of public service announcement. Lady, no one gives two shits whether or not you like hard dick. Do you see me driving around yelling ‘I like threesomes with preferably a hot blond and an Asian?’ No. Because no one cares and it will most likely never happen unless I pay for it. But there’s my point. Maybe I missed the long line of hard dick beating down your front door, but I highly doubt anyone has, or will be looking to have sex with you. But it’s Friday going into Labor Day weekend so I hope for your sake you do find a limp dick. And I hope that person slaps you in the face with it and knocks some sense into you!