Be a top recruited football player at Oregon with this sports facility at your finger tips for 4 years but you have a girlfriend
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OR
Be single working as a life guard at the Playboy Mansion for 4 years with the possibility of banging some of the hottest chicks around (nothing is guaranteed)?
DeadSpin: The University of Oregon just opened a brand new $68 million, 145,000-square foot football facility that would make Ozymandias—but not Phil Knight—blush. It is completely bananas.
Not too shabby, right? Must be nice to have the CEO of Nike as an Oregon alum pumping a kajillion dollars into the football program. Wonder if little Asian children built this just like their sneakers. God, listen to me just hatin’ hard as a mothafucka. Imagine getting drafted and the NFL team that picks you has a shittier sports facility? Well that’s what happens to every single player that comes out of this school. Some bullshit right there.
That’s it! Thanks for coming folks! I wasn’t wrong when I said maybe she would make a good onside/pooch kicker. And please save me the bullshit of well at least she tried and followed through with what she wanted to do. This is the NFL, not Make A Wish Foundation.
Side note: All I could think of was the scene from Heavyweights ‘Get on the scale, get off the scale!’
DailyMail: A 28-year-old woman from New York is set to become the first female to be given a try out for the NFL. Lauren Silberman had never kicked anything more than a soccer ball in an organized game before she started practicing long-range field goals. Now she has been given a chance at an NFL regional scouting combine on Sunday at the New York Jets’ training facility in Florham Park, New Jersey. Speaking about her chances of getting the NFL call, Silberman said: ‘I am working hard to prepare but I am also realistic about my chances. ‘I hope my willingness to put myself out there inspires others to seize opportunities and challenges. The support from around the world has been so heartening.’ Her goal for the weekend is to kick perfect 60-yard field goals. However, the odds are against her – scouts are likely to want to see her connect on extra points and chip-shot field goals with some consistency before moving on to the heavy kicking.
Cue the circus music once again. Oh wait…it’s still on loop? I guess the Revis trade rumors are not enough press for these starved attention whores. Lauren Silberman has become the latest victim of the three ringed circus the Jets call an organization. She will never make the team. I’m not saying that because she’s a female, I’m saying that because she’s never kicked a football in her life and at age 28 she’s just gonna walk onto the field and make the Jets? Well…I guess I’ve heard crazier stories but this is far from ‘Invincible.’ She’s going up against guys who have done this for a living. But don’t get me wrong, I would actually love it if she made the team, took up a roster spot, and there was controversy all season about how to utilize her on Special Teams. Imagine Lauren coming out for an onside kick to win the game? Now that I would pay a PSL to see!
Here’s the thing about the Pro Bowl, no one including the players want to go. They had to move the game to the off week between the conference championships and the Super Bowl because of low ratings and even then I chose to watch a Full Throttle Saloon marathon over it. So I guess the 10 fans who went all got seats in the same section and brawled out to keep the day interesting. Even the players on the field were glad to see something going on.
Introducing Katharine Webb. Former Miss Alabama, AJ McCarron’s girlfriend, and now frequent visitor of Brent Musburger and Kirk Herbstreit’s spank bank. How awkward and unnecessary was that little break in the action? Don’t get me wrong, showing her cheering in the stands and explaining who she is was fine in my book, but when you go to the lengths these guys did, it gets a little weird. Almost makes you wonder if they forgot they were on air. I guess they needed to do whatever they could to take the focus off of the raping that was occuring on the field.
Side note: By the sound of his voice, it would not surprise me if Brent was unzipped and choking himself with his microphone chord the very next commercial break.
Walking into the emergency room with your eyeball in your hand? Getting all your teeth knocked out? Possibly dying in the arena? This sport makes American football look like soccer. I mean Jesus Christ, all this for a white cow?? Imagine what they would do for a diamond studded Super Bowl ring! The JETS sure could use a number of these guys to become a relevant NFL team again. One-eyed Willy could replace Santonio Holmes and still have a more productive year, the ripped black dude would obviously replace Bart Scott, and this dude would stand in for Mark Sanchez as well as steal all his women.
How good do you think it felt for that football father to get back out on that field and form tackle an unsuspecting drunk guy? Crowd going nuts, probably got to throw a few haymakers in there while he’s down…I was even excited for him.