Posts Tagged ‘football’

 

The World Cup is almost over so I have to get this all out of my system fast. I wonder if this is how soccer players act while not on the pitch (field for us Americans)?

Side note: As good as that video was, nothing tops this one for me…

 

 

 

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Soccer Coach Wins Dive Of The Year

Posted: June 10, 2014 by subwaycreatures in Funny, Sports
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With the World Cup right around the corner and every American about to become the biggest soccer fan of their life, I felt this was only fitting to post. Just look at the delayed reaction–the dramatic fall to the ground. I’ve seen videos of Taliban members getting sniped to the ground less dramatic than this. Isn’t this the point where someone just throws some of that magic spray on his neck and he gets up completely fine?

 

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Side note: Can’t wait to see all of this shit for the next few weeks:

 

 

Dog Absolutely Destroys Man With Perfect Form Tackle

Posted: June 4, 2014 by subwaycreatures in Awesome
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This dog better have a name like Clowney or LT because it absolutely lays people out like them. Just perfect form tackling right there. When your legs are directly over your head you know you just got lit up. Also, how did this dog not get Eric LeGrand’d right there. Pretty sure most people would’ve been paralyzed jumping head first like that.

Side note: Is anyone going to help the guy getting eaten by the dog? No?

 

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The Tom Brady PSA About High Fives

Posted: January 22, 2014 by subwaycreatures in Sports
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Anyone who watches football (especially Patriots fans) know about Tom Brady’s high five snuffs. Well some guy made a PSA about it and nailed it. If you see Tom Brady, please give the man a high five!

 

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The south is a very special kind of place. The laws are different–it’s like living in 1955 and every once in a while you’ll walk out of your double-wide and see a 7-year old running next to a pickup truck with his father berating him on camera. I would say this is a form of child abuse but I’m pretty sure they don’t know what that is.

Side note: All I could think of watching this

 

 

 

How bout Horse Teeth taking one to the dome and laughing it off? I’ll give her that at least. It’s just a shame that that is probably the best throw Chandler Harnish (who?) will have all season.

 

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Would You Rather…

Posted: August 1, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Would You Rather
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Here’s one for the gents today. Would You Rather…

Be a top recruited football player at Oregon with this sports facility at your finger tips for 4 years but you have a girlfriend

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OR

Be single working as a life guard at the Playboy Mansion for 4 years with the possibility of banging some of the hottest chicks around (nothing is guaranteed)?

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DeadSpin: The University of Oregon just opened a brand new $68 million, 145,000-square foot football facility that would make Ozymandias—but not Phil Knight—blush. It is completely bananas.

 

Not too shabby, right? Must be nice to have the CEO of Nike as an Oregon alum pumping a kajillion dollars into the football program. Wonder if little Asian children built this just like their sneakers. God, listen to me just hatin’ hard as a mothafucka. Imagine getting drafted and the NFL team that picks you has a shittier sports facility? Well that’s what happens to every single player that comes out of this school. Some bullshit right there.

 

Does this 1:39 video not sum up a professional football franchise with the worst management in the game or what?! For anyone who watched the ESPN 30 For 30 Elway to Marino the other night, you painfully saw the Jets select Ken O’Brien over Dan Marino in the 1983 draft. In 2008 we watched them pick Vernon Gholston with the 6th overall pick. I could only imagine what Jets fans are thinking today with their team having TWO high picks in the first round. Will new management bring new hope to NY? Will they actually draft positions they need this year? Or will Idzik hit the ‘simulate draft’ button on his controller and go back to sleep?

With the 9th overall pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New York Jets select the backup punter from East Carolina University

With the 13th overall pick in the 2013 NFL Draft, the New York Jets select Matt Barkley, USC

By the way, this guy is my all time favorite. Obviously the Jets know something that the people up here don’t…said no Jets fans ever.

 

Everything is bigger in Texas is an understatement and in honor of the NFL Draft right around the corner, we introduce Jessica Kylie. Jess is a HUGE Texans fan and helping us get over the hump today. Happy Hump Day!

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