Crazy, Naked Guy Attacks Commuters In San Francisco Train Station [NSFW]

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BoingBoing: On May 10th, a completely naked man entered the 16th street BART station in San Francisco and began attacking people, spitting, urinating and doing gymnastics moves on railings and turnstiles. BART police eventually shut down the station to arrest the man.

 

No matter who you are commuting in SF on this day, it’s a terrifying scene. When a guy is this hopped up on drugs (probably PCP), common sense and pain go out the window. Straight up zombie style. You can punch, kick, and hit him and he’ll keep coming at you. I’ve seen cases where tasers and pepper spray don’t even work. Not sure how they got the LMFAO guy down but I definitely wouldn’t hang around to find out. Scary stuff.

So Jesse Eisenberg Is A Dick In Real Life, Right?

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GossipPop: Jesse Eisenberg gave a reporter a very hard time during a recent press interview for his new movie, Now You See Me. The actor continuously berated host Romina Puga while appearing on her Univision show, “Say My Name With Romina.” Eisenberg mocked Puga for referring to Morgan Freeman simply as “Freeman,” saying, “Freeman? What are you on a baseball team with him?” “Don’t call Morgan Freeman ‘Freeman’ like you’re on a little league softball team with him,” he chided. The Social Network star also called Puga “the Carrot Top of interviewers.” When Puga said she may cry at the insult, Eisenberg responded, “Don’t cry now, cry after the interview is over.” Afterwards, Puga blogged about the extremely awkward sit down, writing, “Jesse Eisenberg is the quick-witted bully you think he is. He’s smart, sharp, and mean.” She called the interview “tortuous.”

 

So this video is making it’s rounds on the internet today and most of the websites are dubbing Jesse Eisenberg a dick for this awful interview for his upcoming movie (which not only looks terrible but did not get good reviews). But then after reading some of the comments I noticed there’s a good share of people who are blaming the hot interviewer for the awkwardness. Personally, there’s no doubt in my mind that Eisenberg (yes that’s right, I just called you Eisenberg) nailed the role of Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network because he was just playing himself–a socially awkward asshole–but I also noticed this chick was taking subtle jabs at him too. So my question to you the public is…

 

Girl On Girl Action On An Australian Train [NSFW]

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Looks like it’s just one of those days where if you’re a female you absolutely hate CSC–or love it, I dunno. Nothing really discreet about this and performing oral on a chick in public is one of the hardest tasks to hide. Trust me I know. Nope, no I don’t. But I know this guy, and him and her got it on whoooooooeeeeeee! Nope. They were arrested for public intoxication and indecent exposure.

Does The Whole ‘I Swear I Ride The Subway’ Scam Really Work?

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So Anthony Weiner (NY Mayor candidate/Twitter sexter) took the train this morning in an effort to prove that he’s just as normal as everyone else. How convenient that he missed the AM rush hour where people’s asses and sweaty pits are crammed in your face while the 4-piece mariachi band plays like it’s Cinco de Mayo in the middle of the train. Does this shit really work with voters? He’s gonna get back into the exact same Lincoln Towncar that dropped him off at the subway as soon as he gets to his destination. Bloomberg tries this every once in a while after a terror threat or storm shuts down the city. Like you take the subway one time a year when you’re running for office to show you’re an Average Joe and sit there having a conversation with a guy who probably has no idea who you are. You think he wants to be bothered while he’s trying to read the paper? If it were me I would pull my earphone out and tell him the same thing I tell the inner city kids trying to sell me 2-year old candy…beat it!

Now if voting for mayor depended on subway riding, here’s my vote:

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School Bus Driver Gets Prank Of The Year

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Sarcasm. What a shitty April Fool’s prank. Seriously, when I saw the title “April Fool’s On A School Bus” I was hoping the bus driver was doing 60 and slammed the brakes pancaking the kids faces into the seats. Or hanging the bus over train tracks with a train coming until the kids shit themselves or something. But no school because of a water main break? On April 1st? What a shitty joke and what stupid kids for not picking up on it.

Father Sets Up Camera To Capture Paranormal Activity; Catches Teenage Son Banging His Girlfriend

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DailyMail: A father who rigged up a video camera in his kitchen to capture ghosts he thought were haunting his house accidentally caught his girlfriend making love to his teenage son instead. Convinced his home had been overrun by supernatural spirits, the man, from Tasmania, Australia, set up the camcorder in his kitchen, pressed record and went to work. But when he returned to view the footage his paranoia turned to horror as he watched his partner of 11 years enter the room and begin canoodling with his 16-year-old son. The 28-year-old woman, who cannot be identified for legal reasons, pleaded guilty at Australia’s Supreme Court to five counts of sex with a minor, claiming she hadn’t realised 16 was below the age of consent. The court heard how the affair began when she went into her de facto stepson’s bedroom weeks earlier to discuss his driving lessons. But the conversation soon turned to tickling, then kissing, cuddling and sex, the court heard. She later took the boy upstate where they had sex several times in a hotel room. The boy’s father was so angry when he saw the pair petting in his haunted kitchen, he confronted his partner about what he had seen but she downplayed it as an innocent cuddle. But his son told a different story, admitting they had had sex on several occasions. The man called the police and his girlfriend was duly arrested. The court heard the woman was ashamed and embarrassed by her actions and had tried to repair the broken relationship. However, her lawyer Steve Chopping told the courtroom: ‘She accepts this is not a relationship which can or will continue.’ Justice David Porter remanded the woman in custody and will sentence her on Monday. The case continues.

How about that headline huh? And man-o-man what a shitty situation for this guy. Fuckin’ house is haunted by ghosts…his teenage son is banging his girlfriend. At least he found out where those ghostly moans were coming from so I guess he killed two birds with one stone. But how do you reprimand your son for bending your girlfriend over? That’s what I wanna know. Like you can’t go banging his girlfriend or he’ll be in the cell next to his ex so are we talking grounding til age 18? What’s the just penalty for sleeping with dad’s girlfriend?

How Bad Do We Feel For The Lady Who Says She’s Too Hot To Work?

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DailyMail: Laura Fernee says her good looks are so powerful they are ruining her life – and have forced her to quit her job. The 33-year-old science graduate says her slim figure and pretty face attracted unwanted attention from her male colleagues. She also claims she has been ostracised by other women in the workplace who are jealous of her beauty. Miss Fernee now lives off her wealthy parents after quitting her £30,000 job in scientific research two years ago. She said her appearance meant she was constantly harassed and bullied, and has decided work ‘just isn’t for her’. Yesterday, she said: ‘I’m not lazy and I’m no bimbo. The truth is my good looks have caused massive problems for me when it comes to employment, so I’ve made the decision that employment just isn’t for me at the moment. It’s not my fault … I can’t help the way I look. ‘Male colleagues were only interested in me for how I looked. I wanted them to recognise my achievements and my  professionalism but all they saw was my face and body.’ She said men left ‘romantic gifts’ on her desk and she was ‘constantly asked out’, which she found ‘sleazy’. ‘Even when I was in a laboratory in scrubs with no make-up they still came on to me because of my natural attractiveness. There was nothing I could do to stop it,’ she added. Miss Fernee studied science and medical research to doctorate level and began working in a laboratory in 2008. But she said she was forced to quit three years later because of the treatment she received. She said: ‘They [other women] assumed because I was pretty, I was stupid, so didn’t take me seriously at first and, because of their own insecurities, were jealous of my looks. ‘Then when they realised I was very good at my job, possibly better than them, they hated me even more.’ Miss Fernee’s parents – Catherine, 65, and Alan, 70 – inherited money from Laura’s grandfather, and now pay £2,000 a month in rent and bills for her flat in Notting Hill, London, as well as picking up her credit card payments. They also shell out £1,500 a month for her designer clothes, shoes and handbags, and £700 on haircuts. Miss Fernee pays £80 a week to work out at the gym and spends £1,000 a month on socialising. She said her critics were ‘underestimating just what a curse good looks can be in the workplace’.

 

I’m almost brought to tears hearing stories like these because it’s just not right that people are treated this way. Laura is just an innocent 33-year old trying to live her life like every other normal human being on her parents’ dime. Don’t worry hun, it only gets better from here.
If Laura thought it was bad at first she has to know that going public with this pathetic story was going to make it 100X worse right? Like you don’t even look 33! I’ll be generous and say you look as young as Victoria Grayson from Revenge. Just look at that picture of her in the black tank…um excuse me Laura, you dropped your tits!

I’m Calling Bullshit On The Guy Escaping Out The Window Caught Cheating

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DailyMail: In a stunning example of a soap opera come to life, a video has surfaced from Brazil that depicts the hilarious struggle of a man attempting to escape a cheating woman’s bedroom after her husband has come home. And it’s out a third story window. As the drama begins, a husband and wife are seen arguing on the third-floor patio of an urban apartment building.

 

Not a chance. No way this guy got caught by chica’s husband and had time to tie sheets together to scale a window while the fire department shows up with mats for him to jump onto like this is a regular occurrence. Just doesn’t happen in real life. No idea what it would be a publicity stunt for but I’m not buying this is a real thing.