Tag: facebook

Bored? Here’s What You Should Check Out Today

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Gawker: Great News! There’s A New Virus Out There!

Buzzfeed: Topanga On Cover Of Maxim

Guyism: McDonalds Meltdown

Barstool: Happy International Women’s Day! [NSFWish]

BroBible: Woman In Bikini Arrested For Running Down Highway In Freezing Temperatures

TheChive: Honestly, You Can’t Explain That [PHOTOS]

HuffPost: ‘Virgin’ Sex Doll Sells For Over $105,000

DeadSpin: Kazakhstani Soccer Games Are Apparently Played Underwater

Gothamist: Puking Drunks Terrorizing Union Square

Egotastic!: Katy Perry And Her Elmo Jiggle

HappyPlace: Old People Being Confused On Facebook

DailyOfTheDay: Reporter Gets Humped By Heckler

COEDMagazine: The 60 Nicest Natural Breasts On International Women’s Day

EliteDaily: Sex.com Offers Kobe Bryant $5 Million To Compete Against Lebron In Dunk Contest

Mashable: Free Year Of Netflix Only Costs A Tattoo

BangWithFriends.com Is A Real Thing Now That Hooks You Up With Your Facebook Friends

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That’s right. BangWithFriends has just upped the Facebook game to a new level. It’s apparently a 4-step process that allows you to pick the Facebook friends you want to bang but won’t let them know about it unless they pick you too. If that happens, both parties are told there is a match and the meeting place and time is left up to the both of you. No one on Facebook will ever know you’re on it because it’s a private app. The creator of the website had this to say: “Bang With Friends started with a late night conversation (actually an argument) on the purpose of online dating. The three of us chatted about what was the core of dating (aka the deal breaker) and it came down to having amazing sex. We knew that most relationships revolved around sex, and that even before the dating cycle began there were basic needs and rules of attraction that came into play – so we decided to cut the crap out, and get right down to the nitty gritty. Two hours later, and a few redbull vodkas in our stomach we had a live version – the site spreading and taking off was an accident, but now we’re hearing the craziest things from guys and girls about the site.”

What would you say the ratio of guys to girls is on this? Maybe like 1,121 guys for every 1 girl? And what happens when you actually get matched up? Then you get to awkwardly have that conversation with your friend of 10 years about how now you get to stick it in her thanks to BangWithFriends? I guess if your both on the site then so be it anyway, right?

 

I Wonder What It Feels Like To Sell My Company, Then Lose $400 Million?

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EliteDaily: In what seemed like a good idea at the time, the owners of Instagram took 23 million shares of Facebook valued at $700 million as part of their $1 billion acquisition. This has certainly backfired, as the shares, then valued around $30/share, are now hovering around the $20 mark. This means the owners have lost approximately $300 million on the stock. Ouch. Founders Kevin Systrom and Mike Krieger are far from hurting, as they also took $300 million in cash in the deal. The deal went down in April, and Facebook released its IPO on May 18th, when the stock was valued at $38/share. The shares reached $42/share on the day of the IPO, which had the deal valued at $1.266 billion at that point, but the shares finished flat and have declined ever since.

 

As Facebook stock continues to plummet, it looks like people are jumping ship. This week, Facebook Board of Directors, Peter Thiel, sold off $400 million worth of his stock. Then, Facebook co-founder Dustin Moskovitz sold off $9 million of his shares. THEN, we found out that the Instagram founders who invested in Facebook have lost $400 million already in their stock. I know they still have $300 million in cash but $300 million just isn’t the same as $1 billion. Isn’t this the point where guys start jumping off the roof of their penthouse suites or swallowing the end of a shotgun?

Here’s what I recommend for anyone still interested in buying Facebook stock. You pay me money, I’ll slap you in the face, you go home and call it a day!

And Today’s Caption Contest Winner Is…

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Chris C. “you can look but you can not touch”

 

I know this week was kind of a difficult one but I need everyone to step their game up next week! To get in on the caption contest just “LIKE” the CitySubwayCreatures page on Facebook and every Thursday we will post the day’s caption contest. Thanks to everyone who participated and good luck next week!

https://www.facebook.com/CitySubwayCreatures

14 Year Old Girl Runs Away From Home, Accidentally Gets Deported, Now Pregnant In Colombian Prison

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WFAA:

“Distraught over the loss of her grandfather and her parents’ divorce,” 14-year-old Jakadrien Turner ran away from home, WFAA Dallas reports. Arrested for shoplifting in Houston, she used a fake name that actually belonged to a 22-year-old undocumented immigrant wanted for arrest. What follows is a nightmarish series of mistaken identities and institutional failures, culminating in a teen girl trapped alone and pregnant in a third-world prison. ICE [U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement] officials stepped in… took the girl’s fingerprints, but somehow didn’t confirm her identity and deported her to Colombia, where the Colombian government gave her a work card and released her. Jakadrien, who is African-American, does not know Spanish. She had no known ties to Colombia. After months of searching, Jakadrien’s grandmother tracked the missing teen down on Facebook, discovering her in Bogota with an apparent job as a maid. But that was a month ago, and the Colombian government now has her in a locked detention facility and won’t release her, despite her family’s request. ICE says it is “investigating,” and “also noted there have been instances where ICE has seen cases of individuals providing inaccurate information regarding who they are and their immigration status for ulterior motives.”

 

Talk about the snowball effect! You run away from home, get caught stealing, get deported to Colombia (out of all places), and now you’re knocked up in a foreign prison. The Hollywood script has to already have been started on this one so call up Denzel cause I’m smelling Oscars. I mean I haven’t heard of this kind of luck since the guy who was struck by lightning for the 6th time last summer. What are the chances she uses a fake name of a girl around the same age who is an undocumented immigrant wanted for arrest from Colombia?! Either way, I feel for ya Jakadrien and hopefully you learned to pick an American name next time you run into the law.

 

Teenage Robbers Caught After Posting Pics To Facebook

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HuffPost:

PITTSBURGH — An 18-year-old Pittsburgh man is accused of burglarizing a market with three teens, then posted pictures on his Facebook page showing the suspects mugging with some of the loot. Isaiah Cutler who has been jailed since Friday in the Dec. 12 burglary. Online court records don’t list an attorney for him. Police say Cutler, a 17-year-old and two 14-year-olds stole more than $8,000 worth of cash, cigarettes, candy and checks from the business. About an hour later, police say, Cutler posted pictures of the teens posing with the loot on his page on the social networking site. The younger suspects have been charged in juvenile court and been released to their parents. Cutler faces a preliminary hearing Wednesday on charges of theft, burglary and conspiracy.

 

Open and shut case Johnson. What a day to be a Pittsburgh detective. Just when you thought all the leads went cold in the convenient store robbery these geniuses hand over a conviction on a silver platter. The only thing that would have been easier woulda been walking into the police station and admitting you stole the $8,000. You were home free and $8,000 richer and you couldn’t help but take to Facebook. If there’s one thing Mark Zuckerberg has taught all of us is that everything you do on his site is broadcasted for the world to see. But not to worry, you guys are young and hopefully learned from your mistakes and next time I’m sure it will go over more smoothly.

 

If I Ever Got This Friend Request I’d Delete My Facebook

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Averve:

What’s the best way to scare a guy into using a condom? How about sending him a creepy Facebook friend request from the baby he might have if he doesn’t use one? Brazilian agency AGE Isobar organized just such an insidious campaign for Olla condoms recently, as outlined in the case-study video below. The agency apparently targeted specific guys and created actual Facebook profiles for their unborn children (by tacking “Jr.” on to their names), who then attempt to friend Daddy. Kind of a clever idea, though labor intensive—and surely against Facebook’s usage guidelines.

 

I don’t need Facebook bad enough to be accepting friend requests from my future children. Delete that shit, lay low for a while, and good luck on your quest you little bastard. In all seriousness though what a dumb idea. If my brain didn’t tell me to use a condom, then what makes you think it’s going to tell me to think about recent friend requests I received on Facebook. Besides, everyone knows it’s impossible to get a girl pregnant if she’s on top. It’s pure science.