Posts Tagged ‘facebook’

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Internet Troll: a person who sows discord on the Internet by starting arguments or upsetting people,by posting inflammatory,extraneous, or off-topic messages in an online community (such as a forum, chat room, or blog) with the deliberate intent of provoking readers into an emotional responseor of otherwise disrupting normal on-topic discussion.

Now with that being said, our poor stripper friends are getting their asses handed to them in yesterday’s troll of the day. I was literally watching the comments pop up on the post in real-time with a bag of popcorn just laughing my ass off. You know how you kill an internet troll? You don’t respond and give them ammo. These people were feeding the beast the entire time and he was dropping line after line on them–memes included. I know it’s a lot to read through but it’s all amazing. I promise you this is real and the last names have been blurred to protect those involved. Enjoy!

Side note: I have no goddamn idea what the original post was all about so don’t ask!

 

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The Buddy Cup Sounds Like Every Girls Worst Nightmare

Posted: April 25, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Dumb
Tags: , ,

 

Imagine being a hot chick in a bar and every guy that walks past you grazes your cup and BAM, just like that you’re Facebook friends. Oh you don’t want to talk to me? Well cheers, now we’re friends so deal with it! Nice to meet you…Allison Warren from Bristol, Connecticut. We’re gonna get along just fine! Nothing could ever go wrong with this new system, right?

 

Imagine Chris Hansen rolling up in a ratchety soccer van and slapping the shit out of some creeper? No. Cause Chris Hansen will sit there and talk your ear off til until you consider suicide before some SWAT team takes you down on your way out. Now this show I could watch over and over–this is the way it SHOULD go down. Let the girls’ fathers/brothers take the law into their own hands. Street justice at it’s finest! No camera crew or producers on scene. Big Papa Pump IS the cameraman, enforcer, and host all in one. He’s not gonna beat you into next week–he’s gonna one up that. He’s gonna make a viral video of him bitch slapping the shit out of you in a parking lot til you cry and post it online. Ya better stay up out that inbox, get your glasses main man! must be one of the greatest exit lines ever.

-Thanks to Chris for this

marriage-equality

 

For those of you living on the moon right now, you probably haven’t seen that Facebook/Twitter is covered in pink equal signs. Today marks the beginning of the hearings for equal marriage which everyone is trying to draw attention to and gain support for. I have nothing against gay marriage and I can only HOPE that the Supreme Court agrees that it is fair on every level. But enough of this shit. I promise you the Supreme Court judges are not sitting there counting the number of red profile pictures on Facebook and Twitter and being even the least bit persuaded by them. Those people are as unsympathetic and numb to feelings as a corpse. That’s why they are Supreme Court judges. That’s what they are there for.

Here’s my problem with the whole thing. Most of the people posting this thing aren’t even gay or really even know what’s going on. It’s great if you want to support the cause but if that’s the case, go march in a parade or run a marathon for the cause. Make a real difference! Tomorrow most of these people will switch their profile pictures back to them hammered on St. Paddy’s Day and go about their lives as if nothing ever happened regardless of what the courts rule because this was just an easy way to say ‘I know someone who is gay!’ Same people who were posting Kony 2012 videos for a day and same people who the day of Newtown, posted a bunch of shit about gun control. It’s the trendy thing to do for the day. I’d love to see after today who of these people keep posting about gay rights and equal marriage. Not saying everyone falls under this category but most do.

And now for the comments…you’ve been trolled.

bored

 

Gawker: Great News! There’s A New Virus Out There!

Buzzfeed: Topanga On Cover Of Maxim

Guyism: McDonalds Meltdown

Barstool: Happy International Women’s Day! [NSFWish]

BroBible: Woman In Bikini Arrested For Running Down Highway In Freezing Temperatures

TheChive: Honestly, You Can’t Explain That [PHOTOS]

HuffPost: ‘Virgin’ Sex Doll Sells For Over $105,000

DeadSpin: Kazakhstani Soccer Games Are Apparently Played Underwater

Gothamist: Puking Drunks Terrorizing Union Square

Egotastic!: Katy Perry And Her Elmo Jiggle

HappyPlace: Old People Being Confused On Facebook

DailyOfTheDay: Reporter Gets Humped By Heckler

COEDMagazine: The 60 Nicest Natural Breasts On International Women’s Day

EliteDaily: Sex.com Offers Kobe Bryant $5 Million To Compete Against Lebron In Dunk Contest

Mashable: Free Year Of Netflix Only Costs A Tattoo

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That’s right. BangWithFriends has just upped the Facebook game to a new level. It’s apparently a 4-step process that allows you to pick the Facebook friends you want to bang but won’t let them know about it unless they pick you too. If that happens, both parties are told there is a match and the meeting place and time is left up to the both of you. No one on Facebook will ever know you’re on it because it’s a private app. The creator of the website had this to say: “Bang With Friends started with a late night conversation (actually an argument) on the purpose of online dating. The three of us chatted about what was the core of dating (aka the deal breaker) and it came down to having amazing sex. We knew that most relationships revolved around sex, and that even before the dating cycle began there were basic needs and rules of attraction that came into play – so we decided to cut the crap out, and get right down to the nitty gritty. Two hours later, and a few redbull vodkas in our stomach we had a live version – the site spreading and taking off was an accident, but now we’re hearing the craziest things from guys and girls about the site.”

What would you say the ratio of guys to girls is on this? Maybe like 1,121 guys for every 1 girl? And what happens when you actually get matched up? Then you get to awkwardly have that conversation with your friend of 10 years about how now you get to stick it in her thanks to BangWithFriends? I guess if your both on the site then so be it anyway, right?

 

Chris C. – I touched Rihanna and I liked it. I hope chris brown didnt mind it.
Think you can do better? Jump in on the caption contest every Thursday by “liking” CitySubwayCreatures on Facebook. Thanks to everyone who participated and next week we’ll have a brand new caption contest!

EliteDaily: In what seemed like a good idea at the time, the owners of Instagram took 23 million shares of Facebook valued at $700 million as part of their $1 billion acquisition. This has certainly backfired, as the shares, then valued around $30/share, are now hovering around the $20 mark. This means the owners have lost approximately $300 million on the stock. Ouch. Founders Kevin Systrom and Mike Krieger are far from hurting, as they also took $300 million in cash in the deal. The deal went down in April, and Facebook released its IPO on May 18th, when the stock was valued at $38/share. The shares reached $42/share on the day of the IPO, which had the deal valued at $1.266 billion at that point, but the shares finished flat and have declined ever since.

 

As Facebook stock continues to plummet, it looks like people are jumping ship. This week, Facebook Board of Directors, Peter Thiel, sold off $400 million worth of his stock. Then, Facebook co-founder Dustin Moskovitz sold off $9 million of his shares. THEN, we found out that the Instagram founders who invested in Facebook have lost $400 million already in their stock. I know they still have $300 million in cash but $300 million just isn’t the same as $1 billion. Isn’t this the point where guys start jumping off the roof of their penthouse suites or swallowing the end of a shotgun?

Here’s what I recommend for anyone still interested in buying Facebook stock. You pay me money, I’ll slap you in the face, you go home and call it a day!

Jacqueline Anne: “pants off dance off meets narcoleptic hipster”

 

Think you can do better? Join the caption contest every Thursday by “LIKING” CitySubwayCreatures on Facebook! Thanks for those who participated and next week we will have a new caption contest.

https://www.facebook.com/CitySubwayCreatures

 

Chris C. “you can look but you can not touch”

 

I know this week was kind of a difficult one but I need everyone to step their game up next week! To get in on the caption contest just “LIKE” the CitySubwayCreatures page on Facebook and every Thursday we will post the day’s caption contest. Thanks to everyone who participated and good luck next week!

https://www.facebook.com/CitySubwayCreatures