Love these things. How do these people not worry about shit like this when they are always mic’d and the live news is about to begin?
Tag: news
The Dangers Of Being A News Reporter
No, these aren’t outtakes from Anchorman 2.
James Brown Doesn’t Seem Coked Up At All In This 1988 Interview
This is a maaaaan’s world! That’s why I hit my wife with a lead pipe and got off with a slap on the wrist. Also why I went on national TV higher than Tony Montana and couldn’t get any sentences out other than song lyrics. James mothafuckin’ Brown everybody! I guess the only thing that can stop him is his heart!
Douche Bag Reporter Forces Kid To Give Greatest Reaction Ever
So this was my face while watching that horrendous officiating during the Atlanta/Denver game last night. 4 hour football game that highlighted more flags and booth reviews than all of Sunday combined. Never good when the refs are huddled longer than the players on the field, just to walk the ball 5 yards down. Don’t blame Michael Turner one bit for going to a bar right afterwards and getting sloshed. Hey Roger Goodell, figure it out!
Talk About Awkward: Your News Blooper Of The Day
Yea, canoodling means chat just like fellatio is a type of cloud pattern. Sweet cover, bro.
This Has Got To Be The Greatest Letter I’ve Ever Read!
I NEED this kid to write for CSC immediately. Just listen to those metaphors and his plan for taking over the world. Unicorns feeding me doughnuts?! Throne made of platinum and gold?! Where the fuck do I sign up?! I’m buying everything Junior is selling here, plus some. Besides, it’s kinda like religion. We all know it’s bullshit but juuuuust in case, let’s believe it’s true.
Sixteen Year Old Dies From Jerking Off 42 Times
m24digital.com:
A 16-year-old boy died after masturbating 42 times without stopping in Rubiato town, in Goiás region, Brazil.
His mother told a local newspaper that she already knew about his son’s addiction and that she planned to see the doctor, but the decision came too late.
The young man began to masturbate at midnight and spent the whole night to compulsively touch himself.
At school, his classmates commented on the boy’s problem and some said he asked them to connect to the webcam for being observed.
They further said that his attraction to women was extreme; he was attracted to all kind of women, regardless of texture physics, color and age.
In his room a great amount of pornography was found, including photographs and videos of nude women that were saved on his PC.
Death from masturbating 42 times? How am I alive? Just too many questions unanswered here. What is the possible cause of death in this case? How does one masturbate until they die? Is this really possible? I can see if this kid was strangling himself or had heart problems, but I don’t know if this is plausible otherwise. And let’s get one thing out of the way. If jerking off is an addiction then ‘Hi my name is Dick and I am an addict.’ The kid is 16 years old! Of course he’s gonna spend his Friday night beating that shit up. I remember it like yesterday when I would run up to the computer and fire up the ol’ AOL dial-up modem. The entire house would know I was signing on because of how loud it was and half the time I would cut my mom’s phone calls off. There was nothing very discrete about it if you remember. At that age you’re looking for anyway possible to change up your method so when I hear 42 times, I think this kid hasn’t even made it out of the single A minor leagues yet.
Now I can’t help this kid out when it comes to the ‘being observed’ part of the story but hey, everyone’s got their own thing. But the other part that had me confused was when they said ‘he was attracted to all kinds of women, regardless of texture physics.’ I love that my man didn’t discriminate but can someone please explain to me what this means. Does this mean plastic blow up dolls and/or hairy chicks? Either way dude, go online and find one of the million websites out there. Who the fuck jerks off to naked photographs anymore?
SubwayCreatures 