Brazilian Road Rage At It’s Best

subwaycreatures

 

It always pisses me off when I’m stuck in traffic and motorcycles get to creep right thru like a game of Frogger. I’m sure that’s what’s going on here and the lady couldn’t take it anymore so she had some choice words for this guy. I dunno what he’s all bent outta shape for? He doesn’t have to sit in the traffic and coulda been on his merry way but instead has to kick the one van with the psycho soccer mom in the driver’s seat.

Pretty sure this guy shoulda been dead about 3 different times but that has to be the worst feeling for this chick when she rams a parked car only to find him still pounding on her window.

Old Grandma Tries To Take The Cinnamon Challenge; Hint…Epic Fail

subwaycreatures

 

Holyyyyyy shit! This piece of gold hit the white trash trifecta on the nose! Facial tattoos, half naked people, and swearing grandmas with no teeth. Simply amazing! The sounds that come out of this old bags mouth are just horrifying. At one point she sounded like a 1 week old baby crying and the next she was coughing like she had been working in a mine for 30 years. And those teeth didn’t fall out on accident! That gummy bear went into panic mode and evacuated everything in her mouth as quickly as she could.

Supposedly, this grandma is 60-years old and I’m not at all surprised that she looks 85. That’s what 45 years of drinking, smoking, and drugs will do to the human body. Sorry grandma, you do not get $50 and get those chiclets off the floor before the dog comes and buries them in the backyard.

Whatever Drug Geraldo Rivera Is On, I Want In!

subwaycreatures

 

So by now, unless you live on Mars, you’ve heard the story about Trayvon Martin who was walking down the street with a bag of Skittles and was shot to death by a neighborhood watch looney. So now Geraldo Rivera is coming out and saying that this would have never happened if he wasn’t wearing a hoodie and that parents should not let their kids leave home wearing them.

Listen Riv, not for nothing but check the mirror. Whoever told you leaving home with that ridiculous mustache was a great idea should be locked up cause if I saw you walking on the street, I would 110% mistake you for a pedophile and probably shoot you on spot. Only difference is that I’m pretty sure I’d get away with it cause no one would give a shit. Plant some pics of me as a kid running around in my underwear on ya and get the hell outta there. Open and shut case!

Some Chick Made My Friday By Flour Bombing Kim Kardashian On The Red Carpet

subwaycreatures

 

Picked this up on The Stool and I love every second of it. I mean a simple prank that is completely harmless and absolutely humiliates Kim. Play it off however you want by telling awful jokes about makeup, but we all know inside there is a volcano that is about to erupt behind the scenes. “Luckily she didn’t get me too bad.” From what I can tell, I don’t think she coulda more accurate.

Side note: Why is the chick in the background of this pic reacting like she just watched JFK’s head get blown off? It’s flour hunny.

 

Crazy Chick Punches Drunk Guy On Boston Subway

subwaycreatures

 

These are the kind of people I avoid at all costs on the subway. Did you not hear that crazy’s laugh? I just keep my earphones in and my extremities away from their pets. Cause if you don’t, it’s t-minus 5 seconds until you get a beat down in front of the whole train. I’m a little curious how the camera guy didn’t see this coming though. You have a psychotic bitch telling everyone that she’s going to punch this guy and to even take videos of it. Not really sure where the shock came into play. And next time how bout you tell everyone you’re sending your video right to CitySubwayCreatures instead!

Side note: How scary of a feeling must that be if you’re that guy and you actually hear this bitch start counting down?

Teens Try To Emulate ‘Project X’ Party; Cause $100,000 Of Damage

subwaycreatures

 

So I’m hoping my St. Patty’s Day party doesn’t turn out this way on Saturday but I’m starting to feel as if it might. Us Irish get whiskey in us and all the sudden it’s a combination of Wrestle Mania and Animal House. If I wake up and there’s $100,000 worth of damage to my house I’m gonna be really pissed. I’ll probably go back to sleep, but I’ll be really pissed.