Posts Tagged ‘New York City’

Just A Typical Night Home On The Metro North

Posted: May 19, 2014 by subwaycreatures in Dumb, Fights
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Anyone who lives in NYC area knows what it’s like to take the Long Island Rail Road or Metro North home on a Saturday night. This is it–amateur hour. My guess is this was probably over someone stepping on someone’s shoe or looking at someone the wrong way. I guess we can give them credit for not driving drunk though…right?

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SantaCon Looked Like A Lot Of Fun On Saturday

Posted: December 16, 2013 by subwaycreatures in Fights
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Nothing like waiting on long lines to get into an over packed bar on a snowy, shitty day! I would probably be fighting everyone too. One of these years I’m gonna go to SantaCon to see what this shit is all about.

Side note: Cheap shot of all cheap shots right here

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NYTimes: For decades, the New York City subway car has been a predictable space. Some have seats; some have benches. Graspable pole options vary only slightly. Mariachi bands play, and self-appointed preachers preach. And if there is no seat, no room, no end to a performance, there is often no escape for a rider — at least until the next stop. That may yet change. Metropolitan Transportation Authority officials are envisioning a subway car of the future that offers New Yorkers an out, ending the era of the captive car population. This month, in a 142-page document outlining needs for the next 20 years, the authority noted the benefits of articulated trains — similar to accordion-style buses — that have no doors between cars, allowing unrestricted flow throughout the length of the subway. The inclusion of articulated train cars in the report, a mild surprise to some transit advocates, does not guarantee that the cars will reach the rails anytime soon, or even at all; it was not clear how the cost of the articulated cars compares with that of nonarticulated cars. But for the first time in the subway system’s modern history, the authority appears poised to seriously consider a model adopted in cities like Berlin, Paris and Toronto.

Imagine this? No more smushing into trains like the Chinese or standing with an armpit in your face in the morning rush. Sounds great in a perfect world but it’ll never happen. It would probably mean subway cards costing $10 per swipe. How about we get the 2nd Ave line up and running first (that no one will use since it will only run about 40 city blocks for the first few years). Baby steps MTA, baby steps. You’re still fixing the subway from Sandy and you’re talking about accordion trains of the future. Love the idea but just sounds like a wet dream.

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Gothamist: This was a Q train, I got on at Times Square after work around 9pm and I found her exactly like this, feet up, headphones on, bobbing her head, sipping her Becks, oblivious to people trying to find a seat. The train was pretty crowded, nowhere to sit. I rode the train all the way to Newkirk plaza and she was still there. It seemed to me she was getting off work as well because she had a badge or a keycard around her neck. I’m going to write a missed connection because she might be the one I’ve been waiting for…

 

Look there’s nothing more I like than a girl who gets off work and just wants to let loose and chug a beer like this chick. But when your feet look like you just walked from Financial District to the Upper West Side barefoot then I’m sorry but you’re getting next’d. The diseases that are on her feet probably haven’t been discovered yet. It’s a shame too cause the Ging had a lot going for her.

 

 

We get it, you ride a motorcycle. Fuck you. Driving on the wrong side of the road, riding on sidewalks, and weaving in and out of cars in traffic and then when one car gets cut off and almost hits a bike, they swarm the car and begin hitting it and punching the driver. Fuck these guys. Officially worse than the Taliban. Not sure why they think they are so invincible on a tiny motorcycle but these assholes will get theirs…

 

MTA: Around 12:30 am last night, the conductor aboard a Ditmars-bound N train at Queensboro Plaza reported that there was a shark aboard the train in car #8994. The conductor isolated the car and the train proceeded to Ditmars Boulevard terminal. Upon arrival at Ditmars Boulevard, a Train Service Supervisor reported the shark was dead and he placed it in a garbage bag and disposed of it in the trash. The Road Car Inspector on duty at Ditmars Blvd. normalized the car and returned the train to customer service.

 

They weren’t kidding around with this Sharknado 2 thing coming to NYC huh? Imagine getting that call as a train dispatcher? ‘Ahhhh yea dispatch, this is ahhhhh, N-Train 3442 and ahhhhhh, we ahhhhhh, got a shark on board.’ Knowing New Yorkers, dispatch was probably some pissed off black lady like ‘nigga proceed yo ass to Ditmars! We got a schedule to keep!’

Side note: With the disappointment I’m hearing about Shark Week this season, I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the top story next year.

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Screen shot 2013-06-19 at 10.53.56 AM

Screen shot 2013-06-19 at 10.54.05 AMGothamist: A man was fatally struck by a train in Williamsburg last night. According to police, the 51-year-old man was struck by a Queens-bound G train at the Broadway station near Broadway and Union Avenue. The man was found DOA at the scene just after 8 p.m. Police said they did not believe him to be a victim of a crime, but could not say whether his death was an accident or suicide. This appears to be the 31st subway fatality of 2013, and at least the 79th person struck by a train. NYC is on pace to exceed the 2012 totals, when 141 people were hit by trains, and 55 were killed.

 

And just like clockwork there’s our subway fatality of the week. We are now averaging 1 subway death every 6 days. NYC is on pace to crush last year’s numbers and if you’re curious to see a 7 second vine of firefighters responding last night CLICK HERE.

 

Imagine this shit happening in NYC during rush hour? Holy shit talk about a free-for-all. This would be the best opportunity to throw every mariachi band, annoying talker, loud music listener right off the train. Whoops! Wasn’t my fault you fucks forgot to close the doors!

Side note: I don’t know what country this is in but the fact that they get padded seats is insane. See how long those would last in the NYC subway!

 

Stand clear of the closing doors motherfucker! Can’t tell you how many times I’ve wanted to do this in the subway going somewhere. Chick barely gets on the train as the doors close and she stands there holding them while her friends are taking their damn time swiping their cards through the turnstile. Problem is usually it’s the ratchiest of the ratchet chicks that pull this shit who would absolutely kick my ass. The other problem is that even if I punted the chick off the train, the doors would probably fling back open and stay open. Why can’t the trains just leave anyway?

 

Ah yes, the good ol’ J train. I believe that’s the subway line that starts at the devil’s taint, makes stops in third world countries such as Afghanistan and North Korea, and then somehow ends up in lower Manhattan. Always something to see as apparent by this video. No one to tell these old folks otherwise and it looks like no one even cares. And thank you Prince Nasty and Nego Yams for that thrilling commentary and vertical video.

Side note: Is there anything more dirty and risky than sharing a joint with a bum on the subway?

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