That moment when you think you’ve discovered a new kind of plant species and it turns out to be a used, rubber sex toy.
Category: VIDEOS
Man Arrested For Having Sex With Teddy Bear…For The 4th Time
Cincinnati, Ohio (The Weekly Vice) – Charles Marshall, a 28-year-old Cincinnati man was jailed Wednesday after he was allegedly caught having sex with a teddy bear in a public place. The arrest marks the fourth time he has been arrested for the same charge. According to Cincinnati Police, Marshall was apprehended near the Elm Street Health Clinic after employees spotted him masturbating with a teddy bear in an alley and called police. When officers arrived, he was still masturbating with the bear. Investigators say this is the fourth time Marshall had been arrested for similar charges since 2010. In the past, he had received short stays in prison and was ordered to pay small fines. In 2010, we was ordered to stay away from all public libraries in Hamilton County, Ohio after a witness saw him masturbating with a stuffed animal in a public restroom. He was arrested again in 2010 and in 2011. It is unclear whether Marshall used the same teddy bear on every occasion. Marshall was booked into jail and charged with engaging in public indecency and disorderly conduct.
Every once in a while a stuffed animal will come along that will catch your eye and you know right then and there that you have to bang it. After all, it’s love at first sight. Well, not really but that’s the world Charles Marshall is living in. The movie ‘TED’ must be like hardcore porn for this dude!
Little Boy Dies, Comes Back To Life At Funeral, Promptly Dies Again
Daily Mail: A two-year-old Brazilian boy, Kelvin Santos, stopped breathing during a treatment for pneumonia and was declared dead at 7:40pm on Friday. His body was handed over to his family in a plastic bag, and the devastated family took him home where they held a wake for him. Throughout the night the little boy’s body laid in an open coffin, but an hour before his funeral was supposed to take place on Saturday, the boy apparently sat up in his coffin and said: “Daddy, can I have some water?”. Unfortunately the “miracle” was short lived, because shortly after waking, the little boy laid back down, just the way he was. The family could not wake him, and he was dead again. The father rushed his son back to the Aberlardo Santos hospital in Belem, and doctors reexamined the boy, but unfortunately confirmed that he had no signs of life. The family decided to delay the funeral for an hour in the hope that he would wake up again, but ended up burying him at 5pm that day in a local cemetery.
You gotta be kidding me with this one! Miracle, shmiracle. How you suppose to bury this kid if he’s gonna snap out of it an hour later asking for milk and cookies? Hey Kelvin, make up your goddamn mind. You can’t just keep coming back from the dead asking for petty things!
And Now For Your WTF Video Of The Week
Possibly the worst way to waste 2 minutes of my life. At least I didn’t pay for a ticket to watch this in the audience like the rest of these clown dicks.
Yes They Exist, 31-Year Old Babies Who Still Wear Diapers And Drink From Bottles
Minus the props, I have a couple friends like this. Old as fuck still getting pampered at home. Not sure they go as far as having their psycho mothers change their diapers but let’s just say they are still dependent on the little things. This show has gotta be one of the scariest shows on TV. Some of the other stories they do are bad but this has got to be the most horrifying one I’ve seen. Straight up reminds me of Francis from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. Guy has issues beyond therapy and he shouldn’t be allowed out of his crib. Perfect girl for this guy? Courtney Stodden only because I feel like they are mentally on the same level and she clearly likes creeps. For the second part of the video click here.
Most disturbing line: I feel like when I’m wearing a diaper, it’s a constant hug from Mommy.
‘Meet The Fokkens’; You Know, The 68-Year Old Twin Hookers
Just look at’em. The youth. The charm. The sex appeal. The pineapple figures. How can anyone resist? How the hell can you not get by on state pension checks but hooking as a grandma is doing the job? Fuck is wrong with some of these countries? Anyway, not a documentary I’ll put at the top of my Netflix queue any time soon.
Man’s Dick Falls Off After Penis Surgery
I just cringed hearing this story. Flesh-eating bacteria? Gang green of the dick? No more sex? Sits to pee? AND the whole world now knows about it? This dude is living every man’s hell. Fuck, I’d go into hiding in Peru too. Like Machu Picchu kind of hiding. I don’t wanna come off insensitive but what’s the point of this guy living anymore? I’d for sure be swan diving into the wood chipper right about now. I could sue for all the money in the world and I wouldn’t be happy without my penis. My philosophy is it’s my dick’s world and I’m just living in it. Just saying…
‘Bikini Island Commercial’ Is Just A Reason To Watch Chicks Run Around In Bikinis
Strange, long commercial but the only thing that woulda made this better would be to take out the guy and his shoe store.
-Thanks to Chris for the vid
Woman Gets Into Subway Argument While With Her Kid
Welp, this kid’s future appears brighter than the sun. Just like Kevin Hart said, it’s hard to talk shit when you got a baby bag over your shoulder.
People Brawl In Chinese Subway; Surpringly Not Ninjas
If you told me there was a brawl with Chinese people in the subway, I would picture a scene from some Bruce Lee or Jackie Chan movie with guys running up walls and flipping off handrails. What is this chaotic bullshit?? Not even a ‘FINISH HIM’ at the end! Come on China, total letdown.
SubwayCreatures 