Category: Sports

Why Is This The First Time I’ve Ever Heard Of The Florence Fight Club?

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Walking into the emergency room with your eyeball in your hand? Getting all your teeth knocked out? Possibly dying in the arena? This sport makes American football look like soccer. I mean Jesus Christ, all this for a white cow?? Imagine what they would do for a diamond studded Super Bowl ring! The JETS sure could use a number of these guys to become a relevant NFL team again. One-eyed Willy could replace Santonio Holmes and still have a more productive year, the ripped black dude would obviously replace Bart Scott, and this dude would stand in for Mark Sanchez as well as steal all his women.

Check Out Forbes List Of The 10 Most Overpaid NFL Players

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No surprise three Jets players land on this list and I’m actually shocked Mark Sanchez isn’t on it. I get Cromartie has about 52 mouths to feed but dude, your production to salary ratio blows dick! Santonio hasn’t been relevant since the Jets playoff run a couple seasons ago and David Harris still plays? I thought he owned a used car dealership in Jersey.

EliteDaily:

The List:

1. David Harris

New York Jets

2012 Salary: $12 milllion

Good linebacker, but the second-highest paid defensive player in the league? Harris has been All-Pro once (second team in 2009) in five years.

 

2. Karlos Dansby

Miami Dolphins

2012 salary: $10.7 million

League’s second highest paid linebacker has been a steady performer for eight seasons but never an All Pro.

 

3. Johnathan Joseph

Houston Texans

2012 salary: $9.75 million

Terrific last season, but the corner drafted in the first round in 2006 has started a full 16-game season once (2009) and been named All-Pro once (2011).

 

4. Marcedes Lewis

Jacksonville Jaguars

2012 Salary: $9.6 million

Receiver’s big 2010 season (58 catches, 700 yards, 10 TDs) was his only standout performance in a six-year career.

 

5. Santonio Holmes

New York Jets

2012 salary: $9.25 million

League’s sixth-highest paid receiver has broken 1,000 yards just once, with Pittsburgh in 2009. Steelers let Holmes and his questionable attitude go for a fifth round draft pick to the Jets, who promptly gave him a five-year, $45 million.

 

6. DeAngelo Williams

Carolina Panthers

2012 salary: $8.7 million

Running back was very good in 2008 and 2009, otherwise limited contributions through six seasons.

 

7. Antonio Cromartie

New York Jets

2012 salary: $8.25 million

Corner sees a lot of action as opponents prefer to pick on him instead of Darrelle Revis on the other side.

Cromartie’s high-risk, high-reward style leads to big plays but also a lot of burn marks.

 

8. Sidney Rice

Seattle Seahawks

2012 salary: $8.2 million

Wide receiver has had trouble staying on the field throughout a five-year career, doing little beyond his 1,312-yard All Pro season of 2009.

 

9. Vernon Davis

San Francisco 49ers

2012 salary: $8 million

Tight end had 78 receptions and 13 TDs in his 2009 Pro Bowl season. Didn’t approach those numbers in any of his other five seasons.

 

10. Darren McFadden

Oakland Raiders

2012 salary: $7.8 million

Running back has played just 46 of a possible 65 games since the Raiders took him No. 4 overall in the 2008 draft. McFadden rushed for 1,157 yards in 2010; no more than 614 in any other season.

Soccer Player Almost Loses Hand Throwing Grenade Off Field

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Come on Iran. You call THAT a grenade? I’ve set off fireworks bigger than that thing. Aren’t grenades suppose to blow people up in like a 20 foot circumference of it? No one barely flinched! I will say, however, soccer would be so much more interesting if IEDs and grenades were used during the game…they might be onto something here.

Flula, The German Nazi, Doesn’t Understand Football’s Name

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Hey Flula, can you’s explains to meh vhy in the German soccer dey fall ven no one evens touches them? Vhy do dey do dis? And den dey roll avound on deh ground like dey’ve been shot by American sniper. Vhy? And vhy can no one score goal in German soccer? I feel like vatching German soccer is 90 minutes of my life I vill never get back. I don’t understand deh name soccer or German football…should be called German Vagineball ifs yous ask meh.

Douche Bag Reporter Forces Kid To Give Greatest Reaction Ever

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So this was my face while watching that horrendous officiating during the Atlanta/Denver game last night. 4 hour football game that highlighted more flags and booth reviews than all of Sunday combined. Never good when the refs are huddled longer than the players on the field, just to walk the ball 5 yards down. Don’t blame Michael Turner one bit for going to a bar right afterwards and getting sloshed. Hey Roger Goodell, figure it out!

Man With One Arm Fights Man With Two Arms…Who You Got?

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I have all the respect in the world for MMA fighters. Simply out of their fucking minds to take the kinds of beatings they do for a living and at the end of the day, some are just getting by financially. But I mean you HAVE to call it quits when you lose to a dude with one arm, right? I mean, this is what you do for a living and you just went night-night to a guy who has a total disadvantage. I’m not trying to act like I know everything about the sport but when a guy is missing half his left arm, doesn’t that mean he can’t protect that side of his head? Don’t you throw right hooks all day long?

In Honor Of The Olympics, A High Bar Fail

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When you watch too much of the Olympics you tend to think you can do all the shit you see the gymnasts do. Nick, however, makes the Special Olympics look challenging by one of the most ridiculous displays of athleticism I’ve ever seen.

Side note: The females in the Olympic Games need to wear their age on their uniforms so I don’t feel like a total pedophile watching. Just saying.